Saturday, May 16, 2009

The Importance of Family Time


With all the distractions in modern society, it is all too easy for families to go days without any real interactions. That is why I instituted some basic rules in our house to ensure we always have time together every day.

Rule 1 - Dinner is eaten at the table during the work week. This is 15-30 minutes every night when we are all face to face. We catch up on the day's events, discuss any issues, reminisce, enjoy a laugh and I have the opportunity to correct poor manners where necessary. The modern habit of eating in front of the tv is, I believe, the main reason we see so many awkward and unintentionally rude children today. It also means that our children are missing out on many life lessons that parents pass on in daily conversation. I learned a lot of my ethics and morals through casual conversations and reminiscences I shared with my parents as a child. When do modern parents have the opportunity to share their thoughts?

Rule 2 - Family hour. At 6.30pm, the tv, computer and mobile phones are switched off and don't come back on until bed time. By 7.30, we are all finished with baths, tv and chores so we all come together in the living room. This is precious time together without interruption. My oldest daughter is 14 and therefore too cool for games so one night a week, we allow tv in the form of watching a family show together, like Smallville. My 12 year old daughter loves to sing so we often have karaoke competitions while my 9 year old boy enjoys games so it's Bingo, Backgammon or Hangman. This time reminds us that we can have fun together and that parents aren't just taskmasters ordering kids around all the time.

Rule 3 - At least one day each weekend we have an family outing. This is so important to bonding and building strong memories. My childhood memories are coloured with glorious images of the times we spent together on picnics, climbing mountains, trekking to waterfalls, large family gatherings, swimming in creeks and rivers, camping...I could go on and on. While I am not as adventurous as my father, I try to ensure we get out and laugh, explore, enjoy the sun and fresh air every weekend. These build family ties in a way that sitting at home can't, because on outings we can forget about duties and chores and just enjoy each other.

If we didn't make this time, it would be easy for our family to spend the entire evening or even the whole day without really connecting. My 14 year old always has her mobile in her hands, my 12 year old loves to watch tv or hang in her room while my 9 year old enjoys computer games and riding a bike with his friends. We become ships passing in the night, without a conscious effort by us to pull all the ships into port! Need parenting advice? Read How to Raise a Child
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